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Dr Karen Massey Registered Psychologist Emergo Counselling Services
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Recommended Reading

Trees with Ice Frost

Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.
Dale Carnegie

Neuroplasticity of the Brain

The Brain that Changes Itself by Dr. Norman Doidge, a psychiatrist in Canada. 2007. Penguin Group.

This book tells 11 different stories about personal achievements and the research in areas such as how to stop worry, bad habits, OCD, managing pain, ADHD, and stroke victims learn to speak again,

Biology of Belief: Unleashing the power of consciousness, matter & miracles by Bruce Lipton. 2008. Hay House.

This book provides a good discussion of epigenetics, and also about how the cells of our body are affected by our thoughts.

Change your Brain change your Body: use your brain to get and keep the body you have always wanted by Daniel Amen. 2010. Three Rivers Press.

This book shows you how to improve your mind/body from many aspects such as how to: strengthen your immune system, lower your blood pressure, return back to your skinny weight, and make love to recharge your brain and body.

Self Help

Getting Past your Past: take control of your life with self-help techniques from EMDR Therapy by Francine Shapiro. 2012. Rodale.

This is a user friendly book about EMDR, written by the creator of EMDR. The book helps you understand how your behavior is being impacted from unresolved memories and patterns in your past. It gives ideas of how to move ahead in your life.

The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. 1997. Amber-Allen Publishing CA

This classic book is about how to live life in authenticity. It discusses the importance of Being your Word, don't take anything personally, don't make assumptions, and always do your best.

Physics of the Soul by Amit Goswami. 2001.

If you need help in understanding the quantum physics model of reality, and the beliefs of spiritual and religious traditions, this book is for you.

Couples and Marriage Counselling

Getting the Love you Want: A guide for Couples by Harville Hendrix. (1988) Owl Books, Henry Holt and Company, New York.

Although this book is about 30 years old it has stood the test of time since it is still in print and being used by couples and therapists. This is an easy to read book that chronicles the characteristics of couples who live an "Unconscious Marriage" and through struggles realize that they need to have a "Conscious Marriage." This is a practical, how-to-do-it guide that will get you started on the way to better communicating and a better relationship.

Mom's House, Dad's House: A complete guide for parents who are separated, divorced, or remarried, by I. Ricci. (1997). Fireside, Simon & Schuster, New York.
This book contains a useful 7 Stage model that gives a practical description of the separation process. These stages help you know when the difficult stages are now behind you. The book is filled with tips on handling the stages and the pitfalls to avoid.

Soul Mates: Honoring the Mysteries of Love and Relationship by Thomas Moore. 1994.Harper Collins.

A brilliantly written, classic book that helps us understand the meeting place of archetypes, psychology, mythology, and imagination when it comes to understanding what it means to be in love, married, and to be a friend.

Keys to the Kingdom by Alison A. Armstong, 2003. PAX programs incorporated.

Alison Armstong is one of the leading relationship experts in North America. Her books, DVDs. CDs provide helpful information for men and women about how to Celebrate Men and Satisfy women. www.understandmen.com

Family Constellation

Success in Life by Bert Hellinger. 2013. Hellinger Publications.

This book goes deeply into the blocks to success are due to a fundamental disconnection between how we approach life and how we approach work.

Love's Hidden Symmetry: What makes love work in relationships by Bert Hellinger, Gunthard Weber & Hunter Beaumont (1998). Zeig, Tucker & Co., Phoenix, Arizona.

An introductory book that is considered the starting point to understanding Constellation Work. It gives a good overview of the therapeutic approach that has been honed by Bert Hellinger over the past four decades. You will read how it is possible to recognize problematic patterns, to interrupt these unproductive patterns, and to kindle the possibility of change in areas that are seldom addressed at a deep, spirit and soul level.

The Art and Practice of Family Constellations: Leading Family Constellations as Developedby Bert Hellinger by Bertold Ulsamer. 2001. Carl-Auer-Systeme Verlag, Weberstrasse 2, 69120 Heidelberg, Germany.

A must read for those who want to learn how to facilitate or to understand the dynamics of constellation work.

No Waves without the Ocean: Experiences and thoughtsby Bert Hellinger. 2006. Koninklijke Wohrmann, Zutphen, Netherlands.

Unlike other Hellinger books, this one is a reference book. It captures his work between 1992 and 2000. It is thoughtfully organized so that you can find a topic easily, for example dealing with issues common to "Men and Women" such as the couple relationship takes priority over parenthood, fear of love, and the pain of separation. He also deals with "Sickness and healing in families" such as cancer, anorexia and bulimia, overeating and fasting, asthma and depression.

Supporting Love: How love works in Couple Relationships by Bert Hellinger. 2001. Zeig, Tucker & Theisen, Phoenix, AZ.

Always filled with deep insights, Hellinger's views and descriptions of his seminar results provide a unique way of helping couples.

Other Helpful Books

Changing for Good: A revolutionary six-stage program for overcoming bad habits and moving your life positively forward by J.O. Prochaska, J.C. Norcross, C.C. Diclemente (1994). Avon Books, New York.

A practical way of assessing what stage of change you are at is provided by this six stage model. Using stopping smoking as the change issue, we can follow the thought process through the six stages as follows: Are you not even thinking about stopping smoking? (precontemplation stage). Are you thinking you might stop someday? (contemplation) Have you made a decision to stop in the next two months? (preparation) Have you now quit? (action) Did you go to a party last night and did not smoke (maintenance) Have you not smoked for the past year (successful termination).

Five Steps to Forgiveness: The Art and Science of Forgiving by E. Worthington. Crown Publishers. New York. 2001.

This book introduces you to a five step model for forgiving called the "Pyramid Model" to reach forgiveness, and where wanted, to reconcile, keeping in mind that the actual carrying out of the forgiveness process is not straightforward nor easy. The model, however is straightforward in suggesting you start by understanding the situation where you are currently unforgiving. There's been a transgression, perception of hurt, hot emotions (anger, fear), and rumination about the event. Now it's time to decide to forgive. Get the book to understand how to empathize, publicly forgive, and hold on to your forgiveness.

Horse Sense for People: Using the gentle wisdom of the Join-Up technique to enrich our relationships at home and at work by Monty Roberts. Alfred Knopf Canada. 2001. ISBN 0-676-97332-9

If you enjoy working with horses or reading about interacting with them, then you may benefit from learning more about relating with horses and transferring that learning into relating with people. Mr. Roberts describes his Join-up technique with horses through building trust and confidence, and not using force or demand. This philosophy of relating with others can be put to good use when dealing with your family, friends and office colleagues, even starting with the basics of having a good handshake to make the first positive impression that you want.